Friday, February 23, 2007

Journalism Geniuses

I'm being lazy and passing on spam today. These were the best headlines of 2006 (although, I think the one about the planet was actually from the 90's).

Imagine that.

Ya think?

That's taking things a bit far, isn't it?


I can't wait to see if they have their father's eyes.

Those lazy no-good sons of bitches!

See if that works better than a fair trial!

No. Really?

I can see how it could have that effect.

Who would have guessed?

What do you think was their first clue?

There's something stronger than duct tape?

Should prove to be no contest.

Weren't they fat enough?

Send a good recipe, and I'll try a couple today.

Podiatrists to join suit.

Shouldn't have eaten those beans.

That shud teech them to sta in skool.

Is that right?

January 8, 2011: Sadly, I add this one from the news today: 

Here's another from the WMC-TV Memphis website in late September 2011: 

Trooper Wounded in Fatal Shooting Recovering
Look out! There might be a zombie running loose in Memphis!

Misty once caught me writing, "She closed her eyes
and looked at the ceiling."

Have you ever written anything stupid?

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Old Souls and the Evolutionary Ladder

“I’m an old soul.” This is almost always said with a certain amount of pride and arrogance, as if the listener should be awed, and the speaker should be worshipped. It always cracks me right the hell up. I’m an old soul, too; I want to make that absolutely clear, then explain why this is not necessarily an awe-inspiring condition of which anyone should be jealous, or (hardly) anyone should be proud.

Any astrologer worth his or her salt can tell in a glance the age of your soul and how many times you have reincarnated by looking at your natal chart. This is not a number; it’s more of a biography – where you’ve been, and how you spent your time there. They can even tell you why you’re back, and what your life plan made in the Bardo is about.

A child is born on that day and that hour when the celestial rays are in mathematical harmony with his individual karma. His horoscope is a challenging portrait, revealing his unalterable past and its probable future result. But the natal chart can be rightly interpreted only by men of intuitive wisdom: these are few. ~ Swami Sri Yukteswar

The theory of reincarnation encompasses the idea that the soul returns to earth in a new body in order to 1. work out the karma of past lives, and 2. master new lessons needing to be learned. Souls who have balanced their karma and learned their lessons have no need to return. They are released from the “sentence” of having to come back to right their wrongs. So if you’ve been back a lot of times, and you’re not an avatar, what does it mean? It means you haven’t yet done either of these things, in spite of trying repeatedly. It means you’re a slow learner. Makes you want to brag a little less about being an old soul, doesn’t it? Don’t worry about it; we are all exactly where we need to be.

There are a few old souls who return to earth (a sacrifice of love) for the purpose of helping mankind. You've heard of entertaining angels, unaware? Many are disguised as every-day, normal human beings, such as Oskar Schindler. Some are so unexpected that we don't think about it or take it seriously, like John Lennon. Others are clearly spiritual leaders such as Mahatma Ghandi, angels of mercy such as Mother Theresa, or those who elevate our awareness, such as Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King, Jr., John F. Kennedy, and Princess Diana. There's even that child in the Sudan. Don't think for a second that his life wasn't a sacrifice of love FOR US. The question is - did we hear his message?

How they appear to us depends on the needs of the world, and how well the individual achieves his or her life plan. Anyone can spread the message of love. Anyone can teach compassion for his fellow man. Some are exceptional at it, and get a lot of people to listen. Are we listening? Are we spreading the word? It’s not the age of our souls that’s significant. Those of the Hindu faith believe that we have always existed, and always will. The Law of Conservation of Matter states matter cannot be destroyed, it can only change form. It’s what we do while we’re here that counts.

Jeffrey Wolf Green is probably the greatest living astrologer today (at least I think he’s still among the living; the last I heard, he was very ill with diabetes, and I can't find his website). Jeff served as a Marine in Viet Nam, where he carried on a telepathic conversation with a Buddhist monk, whom he finally met at the end of his tour of duty. Afterwards, he spent two years in a Vedantic temple, where he became aware of his soul’s purpose and life destiny. He told me the contents of his book Pluto: The Evolutionary Journey of the Soul, came to him in a dream.
Jeff specializes in helping others understand their life purpose according to the plans their souls made in the Bardo. He explains in the book how the four natural evolutionary conditions must be taken into account when interpreting a person’s chart. Check them out and see if you can find where you fit in.

Dimly evolved OR de-evolved state: 2 or 3% of the human race fit into this category. An example of this state are those who are mentally challenged from birth – those born with autism, Down’s Syndrome, and similar deficiencies. However, this category is very strictly divided.

Those in the dimly evolved condition are just evolving into human consciousness from other kingdoms (transmigration), most likely the animal kingdom. They are new human souls, and provide lessons in patience, responsibility, compassion, sacrifice, and unconditional love for their caregivers.

Those in the de-evolved state are in this condition due to prior life karmic consequences. These people are often recognizable by the pinpoint of light in their eyes that we perceive as madness. It can be “madness,” as in rage, as well as mental illness. The examples of these eyes are not being shown in currently de-evolved people, because I don't have any photos of them available. I've had to use the eyes of people who will become de-evolved.
In both conditions, the souls are learning how to be in the human world.


The difference is that the de-evolved are aware of their condition and can do nothing about it, thus the rage. They are re-learning how to be in the world without the ability to change or have any influence upon it. They are here to observe only. They can wreak no havoc. And it ticks them off to no end. This is where people like Charles Manson, Adolf Hitler, Ted Bundy, and Jeffrey Dahmer end up in their next lives; as de-evolved souls.

The Herd state:
75% of the human race exists in this condition, which is characterized by sheeple. They seldom think for themselves. They question nothing. If their daddies were rednecks, they’re rednecks, too. These are the fans of trash TV, and those who think Saturday morning ‘rasslin’ is real. The people who attend church Sunday morning and turn around and treat the waitress at Sunday brunch like shit. They believe what they’re told to believe, do what they’re told to do, and learn by bad example. Tell them the earth is flat, and they believe it. Tell them astrology is bogus, and they believe it. They follow trends, and jump off bridges, because “everyone else is doing it.” They do not wonder who they are, or what their purpose in life might be. They do not seriously question their lives, laws, rules, the existence of a higher power, the superiority of authority figures, whether or not what the preacher or president told them is the truth, or much of anything else, on an independent basis. Oh, and by God, America is the greatest country in the world. Really? It’s better than say, Canada, Switzerland, or Australia? When was the last time one of those countries started a war? These are the lemmings who go along to get along, or simply don’t think. Those who spend many lifetimes in this state become the leaders of it. There’s a scary thought to ponder. We all know people like this, but we’re not one of them right? Look again at the percentage of the human population who occupy this evolutionary state. Some of us are in it.

The Individuated state:
Approximately 25% of the human race exists in this evolutionary condition. These are people who question just about everything on a consistent basis. They want to understand the reasons behind things, the truth of matters, and why a rule or law has been set down. These are people who drove you nuts as kids by always asking, “why?” Every answer given to them presented a new: “But why?” And in many cases, if their parents were sheeple, the answer eventually became, “I don’t know. That’s just the way it is!” or worse, "Because I said so!" These are people who seek to discover things within themselves. They vibrate with independence. They value self-discovery and the freedom to think and decide what’s right for them. They are perfectly willing to allow others to do the same.

The Spiritual state:
2 or 3% of the human population attempt to understand their own life and those of others in a holistic context. Their desire is to understand the nature of all Creation and commonly link themselves to spiritual ideas or teachings as the guiding principles in life. They attempt to discover and align themselves with timeless and universal values, beliefs and truths that apply at all times. There are actually only two desires in the world: One is to unite with the Source of Creation, and the other is to separate from it. The highest condition of this state produces spiritual masters and teachers: Jesus, Buddha, Lao-Tzu, Mohammed, Moses, and so on. These are the avatars.

It’s natural for a person to slip in and out of a particular state once in a while. A person in the Individuated state may have an experience that lifts them to the Spiritual state for a while, but in time, may slide back. A person in the Herd state may make it to the Individuated state later in his life, and maybe even graduate to the Spiritual state. So if you gave some thought to the state you might be in, and aren’t thrilled about it, don’t despair, just work harder at it. And if you’re a bit too arrogant about the state you believe you’re in, watch your step. You could find yourself sliding backwards if you’re not careful.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Why Karma is Only Half the Answer and All We Need is Love

Romulus Crowe asked the other day, “Are we making decisions, or are we simply following a predestined route?”

When you ask one set of questions, one set of doorways opens before you, and when you ask other questions, other doorways open.
~ Gary Zukov, Seat of the Soul; page 101

According to some philosophical, theological thought, The Law of Karma must, by necessity, include the theory of reincarnation. Don’t confuse reincarnation with transmigration. Transmigration is the theory that once a life escapes the bonds of a physical body, it is reborn into another, which can include mineral, vegetable, or animal life. My study has led me to believe that while all human souls may have existed in these forms previously, that once they have graduated from one to the next, there is no going backwards. Animals that may be about to graduate to human souls appear to be dogs, dolphins, and elephants.

Reincarnation is the theory that the human soul is born into another human body, but this doesn’t appear to happen immediately. There seems to be some inbetween time. Therefore, the question arises, where do we go during that time? According to the Tibetan and Egyptian Books of the Dead, the soul leaves the body and enters a place called the Bardo. I don’t believe in the terrifying hallucinations reported to take place there, simply because it doesn’t appear to me that anything like that happened to Bubba. As much as I loved him, a saint he was not, so why would he be spared?
By reading many different texts, I have come to the conclusion that when we enter the Bardo, we are first welcomed home by the loved ones who have gone before us and led to a place where we meet with a council of Wise Souls, twelve in number. There, we are presented with our Akashic Records (The Book of Life), where everything we have ever done is magnetically recorded and played back for us (our lives flashing before our eyes). Here is a good place to remember that time and space do not actually exist, but were designed by man in order to measure, and that in reality, all things may coexist simultaneously.

Here’s the big surprise: We are not judged. Nothing but love exists in this nether plane of the Bardo. Instead, as we review our lives through the Akashic Records, we experience exactly what we have made others experience. We feel whatever we made them feel, whether it was love, hate, envy, jealousy, compassion, pain … etc, and based on those experiences, we see where we succeeded, and where we failed. With the loving guidance of the Wise Council, we then plan our new lives on Earth, based on those things we need to get right. Because we have developed karma with certain other souls, and have some issues that need to be repaired, we tend to reincarnate with the same people over and over again; the same families, the same friends, although not necessarily in the same relationships. The child may become the parent; the friend may become a sibling. In the Bardo, we are all souls aimed at bettering ourselves, and we are all cooperative. We choose our gender, race, nationality, religion, and status in life based on what we need to learn and accomplish.

The light of your soul is instantaneous. There is no time between an intention toward one, and the understanding of that intention by the other. ~ Gary Zukov, Seat of the Soul; page 96

In our plans for our new lives, we enter into contracts with other souls to return and play the roles that are needed to help each other. Subconsciously, we recognize these souls in this life, and we get the feeling we’ve met them before, or sometimes we’re struck with a sense of déjà vu, that odd feeling that we’ve done this before. Could it be that our souls are remembering our plans and contracts, and that we’re preparing to carry them out?

Some souls agree to come back as users and abusers, as murderers, as despots, as starving children in third world countries. By now you must be asking why anyone would volunteer for such a mission. The answer is: for love. All God wants from us is to love each other. Period. We are here to learn to love and to treat each other with compassion, so it’s necessary that some souls return in a capacity that invokes our pity. They know what they’re in for. They know fully well how much they will suffer, and how hard it will be. They volunteer out of love.

Every time you ask the Universe, “Help me to see,” help comes. You may not always be capable of hearing the answers to your questions when you ask them, and the answers may not always come to you in the ways that you expect, but they always come. Sometimes the answer comes in the form of a feeling - a yes feeling or a no feeling - sometimes in the form of a memory, or a thought, that at the time may seem random; sometimes a dream or a realization that is prompted by an experience that will occur the next day. No question is unheard, and no question goes unanswered. “Ask and you shall receive” is the rule, but you must learn how to ask and how to receive. ~ Gary Zukov, Seat of the Soul; page 82

Sometimes in our plans for a new life, we’re seeing way beyond the next one. As an example, Corn Dog, who is challenged by many serious illnesses in this life, may be preparing to become a doctor, scientist, or researcher in her next life. It would make sense that her father in this life was a doctor. It may also be the case that he was abusive to help her learn the compassion and gentility she will need for the life she may be working toward. She also may suffer in this life to help others learn compassion.

If a daughter who harbors resentment toward her father, for example, evolves into a deeper understanding of her relationship with him, such as an understanding of the karmic role that he has played of activating within her a major lesson of love or responsibility, and if her intention to heal herself and her relationship with her father is deep and clear, do not think, even for an instant, that her father is not aware of this, even if she does not speak to him. He is not aware consciously, but his whole being feels what she is doing. His conscious mind may feel it through sudden moments of sentimentalism about things that he had not thought about before, or he may suddenly look at pictures of his daughter as a young child and feel a pull in his heart although he is not consciously aware of why he is feeling what he is feeling or doing what he is doing. ~ Seat of the Soul; page 93

God does not give us more than we can handle. He doesn’t put the kindergartners in college. Those who are suffering through difficult lives have chosen their own lessons. Sure, some people don’t make it. Some decide it’s just too hard and commit suicide. It happens. They fail in their plans this time, but they will have the opportunity to return and try again. Don't get any bright ideas, however; it will be even harder next time.

So far it seems as though much is predestined, but we still have free will. We can choose not to listen to our inner compass, and not to honor our contracts – which in turn, creates more karma to be balanced. There’s a good reason we all possess intuition, and a good reason we dream, just as there are reasons why people go into comas, or have near-death experiences.Next time, hints to help you know where you are standing on the ladder of the evolutionary journey of your soul.

Why Is Life So Unfair?

Those of you who don’t read the comments here may not know that I’m blogging again because I’m unable to finish rewriting my manuscript in time to submit it for the contest deadline. I may also not be able to continue blogging, so I’m doing it while I can. Something came up that has thrown me off track. The last few days have been challenging ones for me. They have made me want to rant, rave, and rail against whatever karma I have that makes my life suck.

I am not alone. A lot of you are facing big challenges as well, and some of you are making painful transitions. Juju is troubled by affairs of the heart. Rain is coping with family members who require her constant care. Corn Dog, the bravest of us all, has to struggle every day just to continue to live. I don’t think Roxan can tell us when she last had a “good day.” Sonya is buried under twelve feet of snow, and her husband is stranded, unable to get home to help her because of it. And none of us are alone with our troubles. All over the world, people are homeless, sick, starving, and in either physical or emotional pain.

Many years ago, this is the point where I would be shouting, “Where is the justice in the world? Where is God? What kind of God allows these things to happen? Why is life so unfair?” Why are some privileged and born with silver spoons in their mouths, and others are born to suffer? Are Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie better people, or more deserving than us? Are we better than this child? Compared to him, I live a life of unimaginable wealth. WTF? When I was a kid, my mom used to tell me to clean my plate, that children in China were starving. Being a little smart ass, I told her we should wrap up my spinach and send it to them. In spite of myself, I learned early on that life is neither fair, nor equal, and it made it very hard to believe in God.

In 1979, this happened, and I was unable to be agnostic any longer. My faith in a Source of All Things was not a choice. It became undeniable, but it still didn’t explain the inequities I saw in life, so I went searching. That’s when I came across a concept called karma. You know what karma is … an eye for an eye … do unto others … for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Every cause that has not yet produced its effect is an event that has not yet come to completion.
~ Gary Zukov, Seat of the Soul; page 41

Aha! There was an answer. We were being punished for the actions of our previous lives. One astrological theory stated that until a person experienced their first Saturn Return (between the ages of 28 and 29), they were working off karmic debt. There was an end in sight! Only the woes didn’t end. I knew I wasn’t doing anything to anyone that was boomeranging back on me. I wasn’t stealing, cheating, lying, gossiping, or anything else I could think of that would cause those things to come flying back in my face, yet they continued to happen. There had to be another answer. I could not figure out what the hell I had done to deserve my life; whatever it was, it must not have been as bad as what the poor child in the photo did.

Your intentions create the reality that you experience. Until you become aware of this, it happens unconsciously. Therefore, be mindful of what you project. ~ Gary Zukov, Seat of the Soul; page 120

This has grown long, and you want to stop reading now. Tomorrow, I will tell you why karma isn’t the whole story, and why all we need is love.

Continued at Why Karma is Only Half the Answer and All We Need is Love

Followed by Old Souls and the Evolutionary Ladder